Saturday, August 21, 2010

Don't Look Back

But I do, I always do. And I'm filled with regret, rage, and hurt, but a veil of indifference covers it all. I'm too sentimental, I guess, and I'm living in the clouds. What can I do but what I've always done? Take one step forward, forgetting all the betrayals, the mistakes, the decisions I've had to make, and yet carrying them with me on my back while the rest of the world revolves without a care.

I sound pessimistic, upset, even, but I'm not really. For those brief moments when I peeked into someone else's life I was angry and sad all at once, but now that I'm looking away I'm fine again. Betrayal? What is it anyway? Life isn't like Alanna's, although I wish it were. Isn't it so easy to make sense of life in a novel?

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